Emotional Factors in Communicating

Since Adam and Eve, man has wanted to share and communicate in terms of human relations, as well as of the things of common use serving human needs. To do so, man has had to develop a system of communication understandable not only to himself, but to those around him. It is in this sense that symbols first came into existence and we had the beginning of a written and spoken language.

In addition to the average run of “shoulds” which many neurotics place upon themselves when in conflict, the person with a speaking difficulty must also contend with all those attitudes and feelings which are a part of his “Demosthenes complex*.” Since there seems to be an overconcern in these same people with speaking and verbal communication as a whole, additional demands of necessity come into play which are closely related to and allied with the speaking situation. Not only do these people feel that they should charm and win over their listeners or audience with their unique personalities, but at one and the same time, have the added burden of having to struggle and achieve the impossible imaginative expectations of themselves when they speak. Their idea of perfection in speech is not merely to speak without difficulty, without a single blemish or flaw, but to outspeak and outshine even the most experienced and able speakers.

In the attempt to reinforce and maintain his idealized image of himself, the neurotic usually resorts to his intellect and is compelled to feel that he should “know all about” anything. In this concept of allness, he feels that the only kind of security to be gotten cannot come from within, but from a so-called “worship of the intellect,” a rigidity and “all-inclusiveness of the mind,” and finally from an infinite-valued orientation. He feels pushed, driven, and perpetually anxious about not knowing all the answers of life, and all there is to know about everything. He refers to such terms in his everyday language as “all,” “everything,” “everyone,” “nobody,” “ev