Responsibility in Human Relations

Responsibility is defined in Webster's dictionary as a “state of being liable to be called to account, answerable, capable of discharging duty.” This presumes that we actually are aware of accountability, that we are really willing to recognize our feelings, our requirements, and our desires, and that we are able to apply ourselves to and engage actively in our preferences and our problems. I like to think of responsibility as “responding with ability.” “I respond with my ability, and you respond with your ability, and together we cooperatively respond each with our own abilities.”

Consider two areas of responsibility; responsibility to the needs and desires of self; and responsibility toward others and the requirements of circumstances. A good state of equilibrium of these two modalities of responsibility would involve as true and practical a view of issues on each side as one could make, a decision as to the course of action preferred, and a following through to action, with acceptance of the results of such action.

Responsibility to oneself involves an appreciation of one's own desires, aspirations, and preferences; to function, experience, and grow in relationships with others and in the activities of life. We desire, I believe, the enriching experience of real friendship and love. We want good relations with others. We desire appreciation, credit, and rewards commensurate with our worth and ability. We want satisfactions in exercising our capacities and talents in productivity commensurate with our abilities. We try to protect ourselves from actual aggression and exploitation, and, if necessary, to defend ourselves.

In the modality of responsibility to others, the elements comprising responsibility to oneself are recognized likewise as desirable in responsibilities others have for themselves. So long as constructive goals exist, the balance between personal responsibility and responsibility to others can be maintained at a healthy equilibrium, although attitudes a