Reflections

What is there about each of us that is personal and idiosyncratic as our DNA and that, training and theory aside, comes out in our way of being with our patient?

Thus Dr. Althea Horner poses the theme for this series of articles—a wonderful theme. But is it possible for me to know how the other may experience me? My image of myself is always remarkably different from that reflected by almost any snapshot of myself. I definitely prefer my imagined image. Also, is it possible to separate the personal idiosyncratic from training and theory? The end result is one interwoven Gestalt. So the best I can do is to sketch for you a collage of bits of my self-image, a few trends in my professional development and some tales out of my life, hoping they carry a flavor and spirit that also comes out in my work.

I do have an image of my identity as a therapist that I believe informs my therapeutic style. It has no well-defined form, but has color and spirit. I am there. I listen intently. I try to visualize how my patient lives, the street, the house, the interior, the partners in life, the mode of interaction. I inquire actively to fill in gaps in my attempts to picture or empathize. The patient has the knowledge of himself or herself, open or hidden within. I help to bring it out, and once the relevant pieces are out there, a meaningful story unfolds by itself. I maintain I do not interpret. I do, of course, continuously create meaningful scenarios in my head, but these are only tools used in the explorative dialogue. My scenarios are often way off, or near target, but never completely on target, because the idiosyncratic nuances and important