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For 10 years, I have been responsible for a group for adults who were sexually abused during childhood. In this brief paper, I will analyze one aspect of the particular kind of identification that exists between a child and an abusing adult, using Bion's concept of valency and Kaes' theories of unconscious alliances and pacts, in an attempt to further qualify Ferenczi's concept of identification with the aggressor. I will then show how the group encourages the process of disidentification with the aggressor.