This paper explores a common dilemma with couples: the disappearance of an active sexual relationship. Orbach shows how difficulties with merged or avoidant attachments that create implosion can be transformed in the couple relationship to enable a sufficiently separated attachment that allows for sustainable intimacy. The couple is encouraged to use the relationship as a joint psychological space, a third. This joint space takes on the psychic task of providing a secure enough platform to enable them to then individually attain a felt sense of separateness. In this way the tension between their commitment and their distinctiveness is managed and provides a base from which they can re-engage and sustain intimacy.