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This study examined the relation between shame and anger in couples who are at risk for relationship dissolution. The purpose of our research is to identify underlying processes that may impact adults’ capacities to regulate their emotions in intimate relationships. Unlike previous research on the relation of shame to anger, the current study distinguished shame from guilt and used a multidimensional assessment of anger. To date, research on the relation of shame to anger has been hindered by disagreement over the moral, self-regulatory functions of shame.
The participants were 100 couples recruited from the Boston metropolitan area for a study of couples at particular risk for relationship dissolution. This high-risk sample was gathered by focusing recruitment efforts on women who had histories of childhood sexual abuse (50 couples) and couples with recent histories of physical violence (50 couples). Eligible couples had to be married or living together for a minimum of 12 months prior to participating in the study. The mean age for men was 32.1 years (SD = 9.0) and the mean age for women was 31.3 years (SD = 9.3). Thirty-five couples (35%) were married and 65 (65%) were living together in a committed relationship for a minimum of one year. The ethnic makeup of the sample was