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Mario Jacoby came up with the idea of writing this book while reading Simenon. ‘Everyone has a shadow side’, Simenon had written, ‘of which he is more or less ashamed.’ Simenon, with his own secret past to hide, welcomed meeting people on the same plane as himself, with similar symptoms and similar shame, as it made him feel less alone, ‘less of a monster’.
Shame is, as Simenon points out, very much experienced on one's own - it generates a terrible loneliness. The ‘monster’ he cites takes us back to childhood where shame looms so large. Shame can then be overwhelming, a full-body invasion, accompanied by blushing and feelings of helplessness. No visible avenues of escape suggest themselves.
Jacoby's own personal experiences, both personally and professionally, are brought into play here and this personal angle lends weight and force to the book. In his preface he notes the difficulty of trying to pin down such a complex issue. He states, ‘the science of the psyche can never sufficiently encompass the kaleidoscopic richness and complexity of the living soul’ (p. ix). Soul gives an indication of the Jungian orientation of the book, though Jacoby fully covers other writers on the subject.
Jacoby's book is well timed since the significance of shame, often frequently underestimated, is on the increase. It's always said that we live in a guilt culture, characteristic of Western societies. Nowadays, as social structures collapse, the fear of being caught out on one's own, of shame, seems to be increasing. Indeed Jacoby alerts us to the prevalence of ‘shame-anxiety’, the anticipatory fear of being caught out, either through a mistake of one's own, or an omission, or even through too much enthusiasm. This can happen at all stages of therapy, but Jacoby notes how a new patient at the initial interview is often assailed with shame in revealing all to a stranger. He himself usually acknowledges this by verbalizing it, to the evident relief of the newcomer - a useful tip.
Shame bri