Just what Do Women Want

THIS QUESTION HAS A BURNING immediacy for society at a time when traditional gender roles have increasingly come into question. What do women want? Recently, in a different context, I wrote that most women want "time enough to nurture their children adequately without being punished later by an unforgiving job market" (Farber, 1990). This journal has challenged me to respond further by addressing the answer given in a fifteenth century tale of King Arthur (Zimmer, 1956). If nothing else, this ancient story illustrates how long men have striven to answer this question.

The story, in poetry form, is called "The Weddynge of Sir Gawen and Dame Ragnell" (the text alternates between modern spelling and fifteenth century English. Generally I shall use the modern spellings). I will examine this tale and others to place this old question—and answer—in a modern context.

The poem describes how the unarmed King Arthur is accosted in the forest one day by a well-armed knight who believes he was deeply wronged when Arthur stole his lands and gave them to his nephew, Sir Gawain. The knight threatens to kill the king. King Arthur reminds the angry knight that he, Arthur, is unarmed; to kill an unarmed man is unsporting. Relenting, the knight tells Arthur to come to the same spot in one year and tell him the answer to the question, "What is it that a woman most desires in all the world?" If he answers wrongly, he forfeits his life.

King Arthur, perplexed, consults Sir Gawain, and they spend a year questioning both men and women for the answer. The multitude of answers fills two books, but still the king is uneasy and seeks a better answer. He meets in the forest "the most ugly hag mankind had ever seen, " with "face red, nose snotted withal, " and "hanging heavy paps." But she rides her horse gaily and richly saddled.

The hag rides up to the king and tells him immediately that none of his answers is correct. She declares that his l