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Otherness, a state of the unknown and unknowable, is part of gendered, raced, sexual experience. The desire for intelligibility coexists uneasily in a social order that delimits identity and constrains the terms of our knowability. Drawing on Belkin’s vignette of a queer man of color (this issue), I discuss how permutations in knowing and relating to the “other” open up or foreclose possibility in the intersectional space.