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To London
My darling,
It seemed very queer to come back to an empty house but nice to see the message in red on the blotter. And the table set! I find I tend a bit to wander round and give a shout to you to look at a bird or some similar irrelevance. If I have a dazed bachelor look when you come back do not be too surprised. I have been doing, and expect to continue doing, some very hard thinking about these extraordinary people and the extraordinary situation here. One glance at a daily newspaper would convince anyone that it goes far beyond any office. I do not know where or how to tackle it. Today talks of: Stravinsky going to leave L.A. because only two of his works have been performed; San Francesco and L.A. dangers of earthquake; the Dean of U.C.L.A. visiting hunger-strikers outside Royce Hall and congratulating and encouraging them on their strike to get National Guard off the campus; Federal Government subpoena-ing various authorities of various California universities to produce lists of students with grants who have taken part in disorders. Now – what do I do? Go and psychoanalyse someone? Someone in this country must respect the truth for them to be able to put spacecraft round the moon. I am sorry to write such a horrible ‘letter’. It is so much in my mind – and it so much concerns us both – that I can't think of anything else, other than the constant thoughts about you and the children, and they are hardly news (the thoughts I mean). Still, here they are – I love you, and the children – in parallel so to speak …