Often, conflicts cannot be solved; they have to be endured. A hidden idea behind solving conflicts and coming to reconciliation is growth, but what does growth mean? Here growth is understood as the use of different perspectives: at first different perspectives, then their complementary use, followed by their simultaneous use, and then achieving a state of resonating alignment. Finally, growth is described as gaining excentric positionality, introducing a concept from the philosopher Hellmuth Plessner. The author shows these steps from different to complementary to simultaneous use and resonating alignment not by clinical material, but by using the history of the theoretical evolution of psychoanalysis. Growth is an important concept not only for patients, but also for understanding our history.