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When I approached Requarth's book, I was reminded of the feeling I had when the movie Schindler's List was released. I did not want to see the movie, I wanted to have seen the movie. As a psychologist, I have worked with patients who have had loved ones die, some through illness and some through violence. I have not had much exposure to patients who have lost a loved one through suicide. In the spirit of wanting to learn more about something that was good for me, much
like the spirit of wanting to see a movie that I considered important but troubling, I agreed to review Requarth's book, After a Parent's Suicide: Helping Children Heal.
The author writes that this book is aimed for the “suicide survivors” (p. 8) or those whose loved one(s) have died by suicide. While she notes that this book is intended primarily for the surviving parent, she says that the book may be helpful to others including members of the extended family, friends, teachers, and mental health professionals. The organization of the book and the style in which she writes is consistent with her target population. As such, on the one hand the book is easily readable. However, on the other hand, it is poignant, powerful, and emotionally charged so that it is also quite difficult to read, probably more so when the loss is recent and the survivor is grieving.
There are many insights and strategies which make this book valuable. Requarth begins the book with her own “story”; that her mother took her own life when the author was not yet four years old. She shares memories of her mother from childhood, what she learned about her mother later on, and how and when she learned about the circumstances surrounding her mother's death. She shares connections to various times in her life, including her own psychotherapy and choice to become a therapist. This sets the stage for the most powerful aspects of this book; the stories of children who lost a parent in their own words. It is through these children's voices t