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Millions of eyes were riveted on the television coverage of the Casey Anthony murder trial for many months this summer. Accused of murdering her two year old daughter Caylee, Ms Anthony was frequently portrayed in opposites; she was a devoted mother who adored her child and lovingly attended to her needs; she was a seductress obsessed with partying having been spotted at nightclubs living the “bella vita” as the tattoo on her shoulder proclaimed. Who was the real Casey Anthony? Her ultimate acquittal was met with mixed feelings; relief for many, and for others outrage. In 1947, D. W. Winnicott, the pediatrician turned psychoanalyst said, “Let me give some reasons why mothers hate their babies … the baby is ruthless, treats her as scum, an unpaid servant, a slave. He is suspicious, refuses her good food, makes her doubt herself …” (Winnicott, 1947/1982, p. 201). Given the challenges of pregnancy, childbirth and parenting, why do we as a society continue to adhere to an idealized view of mothers, as all giving, all knowing providers? When so much can and does go wrong for children and their mothers, how and why is this notion perpetuated? And what is the cost of such stubborn adherence to perfectionistic ideas?
In her book, The Monster Within: The Hidden Side of Motherhood, Barbara Almond, psychiatrist and psychoanalyst debunks these stubborn myths in an engaging, highly readable yet sophisticated book about maternal ambivalence, a crime that heretofore dared not speak its name. It is Almond's intention to correct that problem, to air the subject of maternal ambivalence, to define and describe it. Most importantly she endeavors to normalize it by reminding us that it is ubiquitous. The idea is to treat it in order to reduce the suffering of mothers and prevent the problems that can befall them and their families as a result of denying the negative feelings that go along with having children.
Referring to maternal ambivalence as the last taboo, Almond argues that all wom