Kenneth Tough: 17 February 1963-29 October 2020

It was with great sorrow that I learnt of the sudden death of Kenneth Tough, whom I knew for many years as a patient in psychotherapy, an inpatient, and, latterly, as a colleague in his role as an expert by experience.

Ken initially was referred to me in 2001 with a significant criminal history and other problems. Although his recovery journey had many ups and downs, his commitment to the treatment was always consistent. He developed a powerful capacity to put feelings and vulnerabilities into words.

Kenneth Tough was born and brought up in the East End of London and had a loving bond with his mother, which helped sustain him, during his life, as did his relationship with one of his brothers. His father died around the time of his birth and this was a loss that affected him.

As a young man Ken became involved in delinquency and later criminality and also had a problem with drugs and alcohol. I know he would want me to refer to this aspect of his life as it was what he shared with others. An aim of therapy is to help somebody face the damage they have done and make reparation in what way they can, which involves living a more creative life. This is an aspect of Ken that is important to emphasise. He embraced the idea of becoming an expert by experience—someone who could communicate with others about his life and the possibility of change, partly because he developed the capacity to have that conversation with himself. It was important for him to move from being only a recipient of treatment and become a provider of aid and support to others. He shared his knowledge of personality disorder, the possibility of recovery, and orientated new people to interventions, for example in the mentalization-based treatment service based in London. He also attended and presented at conferences. His ability to tell his story with wit and humour was a hallmark of his work.

He will be missed.