‘Black Holes’, Deadness and Existing Analytically

In this paper, the author makes metaphorical use of the astrophysical term ‘black hole’ to describe the impact of the psychically ‘dead’ mother. The ‘dead’ mother constitutes a ‘black hole’ experience in the interpersonal, intersubjective space of her child because of the intense grip and compelling pull of her world of inner deadness. Individuals under her influence are either trapped in her deadening world or, if they succeed in detaching themselves, are petrified in their interpersonal space, because of the imminent threat of being drawn back in again. Consequently, they are unable to form object relations of closeness, love and intimate bonding. Can analysis provide the enormous counter-forces needed for freeing them from the grip of these powerful, devouring forces? The author describes the analysis of a man who grew up with a ‘dead’ mother. Analysis began with a patient who was emotionally disconnected, developed into patient (and analyst) being drawn into a ‘black hole’ of deadness and dying, and eventually progressed to his extrication. The emphasis here is on the analytic experience and analytic experiencing. The author relates experientially and theoretically to the pivotal role of the patient-analyst's survival of the deadening, destructive processes in this analysis, and the analyst's capacity (and struggle) to both hold and contain the patient, and remain alive, while experiencing and going through annihilation and death along with the patient.