This article treats sexualization in the work of Heinz Kohut and argues that his ideas remain relevant. We identify the psychological sequence that leads to sexualization; emphasize the fluid relationship between sexuality and sexualization; offer insight into the underlying role that shame plays in sexualization; and note the role of trauma in the early experience in those drawn to sexualized experiences, especially in forms of mirroring. In sexualization, there is often an objectification of the other and a detachment of empathy. It is necessary to define sexualization by an empathic understanding of the individual’s experience of the sexualized activity, rather than by the activity itself. We note the treatment implications of our formulations. Data for this article come from clinical discussions held by the authors who have met as a study group in self psychology since 2014.