Anxiety, shame, guilt, and depression accompany the absence or loss of urinary sphincter control at both ends of the life cycle. The economic costs are high when one reflects that incontinence limits access to child-care facilities and thus the mothers return to gainful employment. It is often the prime reason for admission to nursing home care for the grandmother. Poise and increased self-esteem go along with “being dry.” Dysuria accompanying acute or interstitial cystitis also interferes with personal peace and the ability to work productively. A psychoanalytic review of developmental stages and their constellation of affects and defenses in regard to “wetness” will be discussed as well as when to refer, clarify, or make or receive a urological referral for your patient, their child, or parent.