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I have found that professional support for bereaved children is often not available, and that many adults do not understand or acknowledge the grieving process in children.
Parents’ own grief, as well as mutual protectiveness between adults and children, often preclude the possibility of a parent supporting the
child and validating the child's feelings. Therefore the provision of a bereavement group for occasions when the normal and essential process of mourning becomes stuck or pathological, and even as a prophylactic facilitator of this process, seems worthwhile.
Upon first looking through this American Bereavement Support Program for Children, I was fearful that it would be an example of the exploitation or commercialisation of death that has emanated from the U.S.A. for over twenty years: part of a culture that can treat death cosmetically, literally in the form of made-up corpses, and metaphorically in Gardens of Rest reminiscent of children's fantasies of Heaven.
However, this package completely avoids the dangers of euphemism and idealisation. Indeed, it is an honest, serious, and successful attempt to provide a useful pack for group leaders, consisting of a Leader's manual, and a separate participant's workbook. Thus, they suggest that two leaders conduct a five-week programme, for a group of bereaved 5-10 year-olds, and, separately, for the 11 - 15 range. They discuss the size and composition of groups, and consider whether the circumstances of the death need affect eligibility for a group. They do not exclude children bereaved through the suicide of a parent or close relative. They discuss the length of time since the death, the need for parent/guardian cooperation, and other considerations in planning such a group. They pay attention to the possibility of abnormal grief reactions, and suggest when further professional help be sought.
I found much material that was useful and interesting. Readers may like to see the authors’ list of children's grief reaction