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The main thesis of this paper is concerned with the effect that a traumatic loss or series of losses may have on the physical and psychological development of children. I want to emphasize that feelings around loss, for example, the loss of the breast at weaning, loss of a parent or grandparent or other significant person, or moving house or schools, will be imbued with primitive infantile phantasies which need to be acknowledged, contained and transformed into thoughts. If these feelings cannot be contained by a reasonable environment, because of either trauma or an unavailable thinking caretaker/parent, it is likely that the child will feel totally overwhelmed and an unconscious defence pattern will develop to protect him, and also his loved objects. The extreme defence against an impinging environment, either external or internal, may result in autistic states of mind or in psychosomatic symptoms where unacceptable thoughts are transmuted into bodily symptoms. It is as though there is no gateway through which these difficult feelings can pass and be thought about, thus impeding psychological and physical development.