The Child Therapist's Generative Use of Self

The therapist's use of self, much debated in psychotherapy with adult patients, has received little explicit consideration in discussions of clinical work with children. In this clinical essay, I describe a style of working with children and early adolescents in psychotherapy that makes liberal use of the therapist's “self,” both in the narrow sense of the therapist's self-disclosure and in the broader sense of the use of the therapist's personality, intuition, and affective expressiveness. My discussion focuses on two facets of therapeutic work with children: (a) the use of self in the engagement of children in the treatment process and (b) the child therapist as a source of emotional support. Although not without some risks and limitations, and always accompanied by a necessary appreciation of the unique temperament and character of each child, talking personally to children fosters the child's openness in talking with us. At moments of acute distress, many children also derive immediate, visible emotional support—and, one hopes, some lasting increment of self-acceptance—from the child therapist's generative and humanizing expressions of self.