Moral Development in Young Children Exposed to Domestic Violence: The Case for the Proactive Role of the Therapist

Ample evidence shows that exposure of young children to domestic violence may endanger children’s social-emotional development. Yet limited attention has been devoted to ways of specifically addressing issues of moral development in therapy. We highlight the need to address the potential harmful effects of domestic violence on the child’s moral development, within the context of the child’s relationship with the non-offending parent. We suggest that therapists assume a proactive role in identifying and addressing both the child’s and custodial caregiver’s feelings, perceptions and values relevant to the immoral acts of the perpetrator caregiver. Proactively addressing potential distortions seems essential, even though such a purportedly judgmental position may arouse uneasiness amongst therapists.

Reviewing cases from Child-Parent-Psychotherapy with families exposed to domestic violence, we identify six recurring themes, indicating risk to children’s moral development. Themes include identification with the aggressor, positive feelings toward the perpetrator leading to excusing the violent acts, ambivalence toward the observance of social rules, and difficulties with empathy, guilt, and remorse. Together with the enlisted support of the custodial caregiver, these provide opportunities for the therapist to clarify and repair moral perceptions and feelings, denoting a clear moral stance, thereby contributing to the prevention of intergenerational cycles of violence.