Rarely do we hear a narrative written in the first person, written from the perspective of a child who grew up in the foster care system. This paper provides a window into the interior world of a child who experienced traumatic loss and abandonment. This child-born to emigrant Jamaican parents-grew up in the foster care system in the UK from the early 1970ʹs through the late 1980ʹs. This first-person account is written from the perspective of a child, but also from the perspective of a licensed social worker, a clinician with 26+ years of experience working with foster care youth and families. The writer is a graduate of The New School for Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis, where he received training in Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy. This narrative is just one perspective of a personal journey, and in no way aims to speak for all children who grow up in the foster care system. Given some of the emotionally charged content in this paper, a few details are written in a deliberately vague way to protect the privacy of all persons involved.