This paper seeks to illustrate the ambiguity of the affect of ‘anger’ which masks a number of subtly different emotions observable in clinical work. The author differentiates between anger, rage and hatred in terms of the dialectical relationship between ego and self and pays particular attention to why it is that for some patients, experiences of anger may be harnessed creatively into development, whereas for others, they remain self destructive. Using illustrations from work with two patients in analysis, the author describes how a persistent grievance originating in the earliest stages of life is linked with hatred and can lead to a defensive self structure. It is suggested that the clues to the presence of a grievance and to its potential transformation are likely to be observable first in the analyst's countertransference in the form of an all-embracing emotional strait jacket. Analysts' capacity to tolerate their own hatred is crucial to the transformation of a patient's grievance.