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The author examines her experience as a therapist during, as well as in the years following, her bout with cancer. She has remained well since the initial episode. The paper is of note, both because it discusses a topic about which there is little literature, and because it raises complex ethical and countertransferential issues. At the time of the illness, patients were told only that there was "a family emergency," and none ever became aware of her condition. Friedman concludes that she was not "in collusion" with her patients to deny the cancer, but rather that she had managed "effective and unambivalent compartmentalization." She contrasts her reaction of increased satisfaction with her work, with those of others who have reported resentment of patients' dependency or envy of their good health. Within the next few years after her illness, the author saw three new patients who had had recent losses due to cancer. One remained in successful treatment. The second had lost several relatives to cancer and was facing the imminent loss of yet another; Friedman felt unable to tolerate the prospect of hearing about all these ongoing tragedies, and