This paper develops a new approach to psychoanalytic media studies by applying the neuropsychoanalytic model of the brain by Mark Solms. It proposes that the conscious id is the driving force behind our social networks online, and that Lacanian real is equivalent to Friston free energy. Using Solms’s model, online experience is theorized, according to the psychoanalytic concepts of Freud and Lacan, between affective consciousness and linguistic consciousness, respectively. Being on social networks is inherently stressful for the mind, leading to defense mechanisms arising from the absence of the body, the speed and quantity of data, and less structured thought processes.