In this paper, I describe my ongoing journey with Daniel, a patient with a severe dissociative disorder. With detailed explorations of major enactments, I illustrate how issues around desire, excitement, and intimacy shape our eroticized transference-countertransference imbrication and compel episodic relational states of deadness and terror. Reflecting on the shifting roles of dominance, submission and states of dissociation, I explicate the powerful effects of spontaneity and self-disclosure in the navigation of seemingly intractable stalemates.