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The symbiotic relationship fosters familiarity, security and the predictability of life while it is kept alive as a defense against the possibility of rejection and feeling left out. However, this situation is also a source of anxiety because, in addition to the feelings of unity and integrity like the state of nirvana, it also includes a threat to the loss of self and uniqueness. When couples apply for therapy, they are ready to give back at one level the projections they use as a form of communication between them and to understand each other from another level. Instead of expressing themselves by making each other feel as they feel, they are ready to look for a way of communication in which both parties can realize their own feelings and express this. They request to replace communication habits that no longer function with something else that is more authentic, creative, and developmental. Although this process will be enjoyable by creating a more flexible, more inherent, more authentic psychic state, it will also be painful for both of them. Repositioning themselves in the relationship as an active participant and receiving unconventional reactions are somewhat worrying for everyone.
Symbiotic relationships, regardless of their form, create a very strong dynamic because they are about somehow clinging to life, and therefore they arouse strong emotions in the analyst. Being able to move to position of the third object while maintaining the mentality of being a couple and being able to make sense of what is happening in the intermediate area -with all the interactions by feeling them together with the couple- will help the analyst in this regard.
In this article, I wanted to vividly demonstrate the dynamics I mentioned, using case examples from my clinical and academic studies and my research findings. With what the couple expressed, what we feel in the analytical field comes from a similar place, how we can look at the analysis process semantically and the unconscious emotions that manifest in various forms through ourselves; I tried to show how the emotions created in the analyst by what is happening in the psychoanalytic field can be used as a tool to better understand the couple and feel their difficulties.