This study discusses the rôle of destruction and destructive fantasies in forming a relationship to the body and in experiencing the reality of the body. The starting points are Freud’s conception of the nature of the drives and Winnicott’s theory on the use of an object. The central assumption is that the destructive impulses and fantasies directed towards the body create and strengthen the experience of the body as a part of the extrapsychic reality. By improving the trust in the continuity of bodily existence, they help to lessen the experience of the body as a subjective object which improves our relationship to our bodily reality.