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Budapest, February 28, 1916
Dear Professor,
Today's letter again has to do with my own person; I must write it, even though I sometimes think that it [my own person] is perhaps not at all worth so much effort.
Yesterday was a critical day. I told Frau G. that, to my great sorrow, I don't feel any libido for her at present. Overcoming the depression, she suggested to me that we see one another less frequently for a while, perhaps once a week. We then spent Sunday evening together—and today was the first day of separation.—I feel all washed-out and am in a mood of mourning. For the moment no trace of any feeling of liberation. Nevertheless, I will wait until the end of the week in any case before I see her again.
In the meantime, I am thinking about myself. My feelings are analogous to those which I felt when I renounced Elma, only at that time the depression was more in the form of apathy, and not, as now, of pain and mourning.—The question is whether my resistance now has to do specifically with a person and not with the institution of marriage. (Insufficient development of the primacy of the genitals, to use your expression.)
This time of separation will certainly contribute to the clarification of the state of affairs.
After the leave-taking an anxiety dream: I want to get (with an urgent message—can't be postponed) into Frau G.'s apartment, even though I am afraid of meeting her husband. I actually see Herr Pálos in the front room; he is just about to take his hat from the (instead of the correct word, I