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May 31, 1897
IX., Berggasse 19
Dear Wilhelm,
Have not heard anything from you for a long time. Herewith a few scraps washed ashore by the last thrust. I am noting them down for you alone and hope you will keep them for me. I add nothing by way of apology or explanation: I know these are only premonitions, but something has come of everything of that sort; I have had to take back only the bits of wisdom I wanted to add to the Pcs. [preconscious system]. Another presentiment tells me, as though I already knew — but I know nothing at all — that I shall very soon uncover the source of morality. Thus, the whole matter is still growing in my expectation and gives me the greatest pleasure. If only you were nearer, so that I could tell you about it more easily.
Otherwise the feeling of summer is very powerful. Friday evening we plan to go to Aussee for Whitsun. I do not know whether anything worth reporting will still occur to me; I do not want to work on anything1 any longer; I have laid aside even the dream [book]. Recently I dreamed of [having] overaffectionate feelings for Mathilde, only she was called Hella; and afterward I again saw “Hella” before me, printed in heavy type. Solution: Hella is the name of an American niece whose picture we have been sent.
Mathilde could be called Hella because she recently shed bitter tears over the defeats of the Greeks. She is enthralled by the mythology of ancient Hellas and naturally regards all Hellenes as heroes. The dream of course shows the fulfillment of my wish to catch a Pater2 as the originator of neurosis and thus [the dream] puts an end to my ever-recurring doubts.
Another time I dreamed that I was going up a staircase with very few clothes on. I was moving, as the dream explicitly emphasized, with great agility. (My heart — reassurance!) Suddenly I noticed, however, that a woman was coming after me, and thereupon set in the sensation, so common in dreams, of being glued to the spot, of being paralyzed. The accompanying feeling