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Vienna, March 23, 1900
IX., Berggasse 19
Dear Wilhelm,
I must write to you at length again, after all. Otherwise what would you think? First of all, my most cordial thanks for your
hospitality to Minna. At last I have some proper information about your household: that your mother is well again, which is contrary to my expectations and therefore doubly welcome; how beautiful and how tiny your dear Paulinchen is; and how robust Conrad appears; to say nothing of our old friend Robert and his apta dicta [bons mots] — now I once again have a good picture of them all. I heard with great satisfaction that your interest in my dream-child remains undiminished and that you are lending a hand in urging it upon the Rundschau and its indolent reviewers.1 For after a good deal of wavering in my mind, I have come down on the side of being very grateful to you for standing godfather to it and considering it to be good and genuine. It has become a consolation to me in many a gloomy hour to be able to leave this book behind. True, its reception — at least the reception it has had so far — has certainly not given me any joy. Understanding for it is meager; praise is doled out like alms; to most people it is evidently distasteful. I have not yet seen a trace of anyone who has an inkling of what is significant in it. I explain this by telling myself that I am fifteen to twenty years ahead of my time. Then, of course, the usual qualms associated with forming a judgment about oneself set in.
There has never been a six-month period in which I so constantly and so ardently longed to be living in the same place with you and that which is yours2 as the one that has just passed. You know that I have been going through a deep inner crisis; you would see how it has aged me. I was therefore deeply moved when I heard of your proposal that we meet again this Easter. Anyone who did not understand the more subtle resolution of contradictions would think it incomprehensible that I am not rushing to asse