The paper begins with a simply phrased introduction to the nature of the transference in the psychoanalytic process with children.2 The limitations of theory are pointed out, by contrast with the practical qualities of toughness and sensitivity that are required by the therapist in order to support the child's own need to understand the reality of their inner world, not merely to avoid pain. The aim is to help the child deal with frustration in a more “realistic” way, both internally and externally, instead of turning away or using the distortions of omnipotence.