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There is much said and left unsaid about Eve's life. We are given a summary of the main facts but there are many questions left to wonder about and this is probably the case for Eve and her adoptive mother too. I wanted to ask the therapist more about Eve’s history and present life but was reminded of how the experience of not knowing is such a pervading feature of the adopted child’s internal world.
How do you relax, grow and make the most of what’s available in the present when fundamental markers of life remain mysterious and are not known for various reasons?
Eve’s adoption at six years of age is very late and given the significant level of placement breakdown at this stage, we might think that Eve and her mother are doing well to remain together. The referral was made not long after Eve was placed for adoption and it is clear from the information given that Eve’s development has been significantly compromised. The assessment questions whether she will be able to manage individual work because of her reactiveness and inability to stay in the room, and it is decided that these two issues will become the focus of the therapy. This decision raises pertinent questions about what is the most effective intervention we can make in a situation like this. At times there can be a lot of pressure to work with children individually and this may well be the best intervention, however, I think there is a strong case to be made for working with adoptive children and their parents together. We know that Eve’s attachment patterns tend to be disorganised and she is highly anxious about separation; having her mother in the room, at least for the first phase of treatment, would offer the opportunity to work with both parties on these issues as they unfold in the session. A clinician trained in observation can be enormously helpful in enabling adoptive parents to notice, understand and feel less persecuted by some of the confusing behaviour they have to manage on a daily basis, of