Custody Conflict as a Developmental Trauma

While parental divorce can have a profound effect on the development of a child, the effect of a custody conflict following divorce can have an extreme, traumatic, and lifelong impact on a child. The conflict between the parents that occurred prior to their divorce can be sustained long after the parental divorce, reinforcing highly dysfunctional patterns of relationships between the parents, between each parent and child, and then put the child at risk for pathological patterns of relationships with peers and intimates. Though difficulties in the development of mature object relations and a mature sense of self are obviously at risk given this milieu of overt interpersonal conflict, anger, hatred, and parental preoccupation, difficulties in a child’s capacity to explore the environment, i.e. play, learn academically, and value their body can also be adversely affected. This paper presents cases from varying stages of childhood development to demonstrate the potentially traumatic effects on the development of children living through parental custody conflict, as well as the lifelong effect on an adult experiencing a parental custody conflict in childhood.